Sintellectual Sundays: Teenie Weenie Edition
March 24, 2013
Sintellectual Sundays: Off to South America!
April 7, 2013

Sintellectual Sundays: Kinky Cottontail

Hippity Hoppity

Hippity Hoppity

Hippity Hoppity

Happy Easter! Heh, just typing that reminded me of a funny, if somewhat surreal, occasion on which I wished someone a Happy Easter when it wasn’t Easter at all. I had a massage client with a pretty bad case of erectile dysfunction – he got an erection maybe five times a year. One of those occasions happened during his monthly massage appointment, and he looked so tortured at the poor timing that I told him to go ahead and take care of it, “Happy Easter.” He asked me after he finished why I said that. Me: “Well, the dead came back to life for a brief time, it seemed perversely appropriate”. Him: “I’m Jewish.” Me: “Not today.”

So how did you celebrate? Did you bite the head off a chocolate bunny and make a penis-puppet with it? Did you participate in my Easter-themed cumeating assignment (one week left to do it, and you won’t be able to get the food item much longer)? Did you slip on a pair of pastel panties under your sober church suit? Perhaps you realized that the little yellow peep you were eating was the same size as your little pee-pee.

Kink In The News

“Somehow”, naked pictures of a male mayoral candidate in Villa Park, Illinois ended up on the front page of a phone sex website just two weeks before the election. Unfortunately, the candidate is from the middle-of-nowheresville and does not have an name as suitable for this type pecker-dillo as former NY Congressman Anthony Weiner…and so the story remains an obscure tidbit…much like his manhood. That’s right – judging from these uncensored photos, I would like to formally invite Mr. Heidelmeier to read last Sunday’s journal below and seriously consider joining the Tiny Penis Brigade.

Week on your Knees

Time for a little Spring Cleaning on your hairy man-body. My goal isn’t to feminize you – it’s to make you a little more pleasant to touch. Stop at a drug store this week and pick up some body scrubbing supplies – at the very minimum, one of those net poufs we girls use for spreading around our scented sudsy shower gels. A back scrubber is insufficient for the job, but any form of loofah or ‘shower gloves’ will do the trick nicely. Then select a shower gel that has “microbeads” to add a little oomph to your descaling. Now use all this on everything below the neck every time you shower this week. Feeling a bit femme? Get a pink pouf and pick out a shower gel from the girl’s side of the aisle.

Twittervert in the Twitterverse

SexyTweet9

No Funny No Honey

EasterGayEcard

Testes-MOAN-ial

From my poor little unintentionally-blueballed Cumslut: 

Awful connection, even after a calling back and Jane switching phones.

What a sweetheart for giving me 5 stars and understanding that dealing with a middleman telecom system has the occasional downside. I grumbled with “tech rage”, while he simply lamented that the window of opportunity had passed us by.

DragBunnyHot Damn-Azon!

Here comes Kinky Cottontail, hopping down the bunny trail… but you weren’t really expecting a Holly Madison type, were you? Noooo…not around here!

Thank you, Amazon, for providing an equal opportunity for all the wannabe Drag Bunnies out there – complete with blond wig, bunny ears, “lamb” dress (cute typo) and “bouncy bosom” that honestly brings to mind the word PONTOONS.

And don’t skip over the the product description, which gives us this gem: “Men’s Sexy Bunny Costume,Oh yes… you know you like it. Pink and bouncy baby!”

Sintellinks

Head over to soak up kinky titbits from my phone sex friends:

Dabbling in chastity? Do you dare approach Mistress Reaghan to be your keyholder?

Naughty Olivia shares the tale of her newest webcam slut in Meet the Exhibitor: Enthusiastic Strokerboy.

Ms Fernanda speculates about our desperate humiliation junkie Lil Dick Mike: Cuckold or Cocksucker.

Flirty Dirty & Wordy

WWF-Hung

I topped his GOOP with my HUNG. Oh yeahhhh.

If you want to play Words With Friends with me, I’m Jane Elphinstone
–  Just remember to let me know who you are when you hit me up! –

______________________________________________________

~~Miss Jane~~
JanesAddictive@gmail.com
Care to play on the phone? Check out my NiteFlirt phone sex listings
800-863-5478 ext 9644953

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1 Comment

  1. Chris says:

    *Intriguing* For those of us who remember we don’t live in Pioneer days anymore and already have those things… we get a pass this week… right?